Are you Married To An Angry Man? Find out from one wife’s real-life experience what it's like being Married To An Angry Man. See if Angry Men can change.
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Contents
We’ve all experienced anger. Whether it’s triggered by another person, situation, or the various injustices in the world, anger is a common human feeling and response. But does feeling angry mean you have anger issues?
No.
There’s a difference between occasionally getting angry and having anger issues.
However, knowing whether your anger is in the normal range or a whether you’re one of the many people who have issues with anger can be tricky.
The good news for those whose anger goes beyond the occasional is that there are some very clear signs of anger issues that can help you understand the difference.
The best place to look for signs that you’ve got issues with anger is with the people closest to you.
Most people can do a pretty good job hiding anger from friends and coworkers, but it's our loved ones who see us when we're the most real.
They’re the ones we feel most relaxed and safest with, so, unfortunately, they’re the ones we’re also most likely take our anger out on. And for some of us it happens so often that it becomes a problem.,
Regular anger can cause difficulties with relationships, families, and jobs.
So, what are the signs that you have anger issues and what can you do about it?
Is it possible that because of your anger you could look like this shark to your wife, partner, or kids?
Those of us with anger issues never want to think so, but sadly, sometimes those around us see -- and fear -- us just like we all do a Great White Shark.
It's easy to assume that it's just men who have anger management problems. While it’s true that men’s anger issues can be more obvious, women are just as prone to having problems with anger as men.
Struggling with anger has less to do with gender and more to do with the psychological issues and life experiences that have shaped us.
Often there can be unresolved problems from the past, that have created an emotional struggle within a person. When left unaddressed these feelings eventually impact our ability to control our anger and respond appropriately to situations or other people.
Present day external stresses can play a large role as well.
How we think about and process events is another contributing factor.
People who are already vulnerable to getting angry can find it difficult to let go of anger or control their anger response when faced with even mild stress. This can happen equally to both men and women.
If a person is struggling with anger issues there will be signs.
Below are some real-life examples from people who have a loved one or close friend who is struggling with anger. You'll see that these struggles can be found in men and women alike.
Men
Women
Do you recognize yourself (or someone else) in the quotes above?
If you do, it’s likely that anger has become an issue.
There are a variety of behaviors that can indicate an anger management problem – you just have to know what to look for.
So, just what are some signs that you could have anger issues?
Let’s consider the patterns illustrated in the quotes above. Here are 10 that I identified:
This isn't a complete list of signs that you have anger problems, but it's a pretty good start.
If you recognize yourself, or someone you know, in these quotes or this list of anger symptoms, don't feel too bad.
Struggles with anger are common. The first step towards change is awareness and acceptance of the problem.
I used to see myself within this list too, but I’ve learned how to manage my anger and you can as well.
The biggest obstacle for those of us with anger issues is denying that it's true.
There’s no way to change if you can’t admit to yourself that change is needed.
It will be difficult, but also empowering, for you to be open with those you love about your desire to change. A support system can encourage and help hold you accountable with following through too.
You should know that learning to control your anger it isn't as easy as people would like to think.
However, learning the 3-fold approach we use to effectively treat anger management problems will help immensely.
If you feel anger has gotten difficult to control and you’re seeing signs of anger issues, don’t wait any longer to act.
Anger issues will lead to many serious problems. These can be prevented though if action is taken to change.
Was this article helpful in learning the signs that you (or someone you love) has anger issues? If so, sign-up at the bottom of this page to receive notice of future posts or follow me on Facebook or Twitter where I share other helpful relationship and self-improvement advice like this several times a week.
Editor's Note: This post was originally published August 27, 2015, updated on November 13, 2018 and again for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
Are you Married To An Angry Man? Find out from one wife’s real-life experience what it's like being Married To An Angry Man. See if Angry Men can change.
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I have anger issues, but nothing like this. This is extremely dangerous. It’s very difficult for a man to change. This could be remnants from his childhood that have made him who he is. Without help he can never change. If you feel in danger you need to decide whether you should get out of this relationship
Hi, I have been with my husband for over 10 years now and generally we have a happy loving relationship. we have 2 children together 5 and 7. There have always been minor anger issues with him since we have been married, but its got alot worse in the last 4 years. He works away offshore, but because there hasnt been much work in the winter months jan-april these last few years, his mood dramatically changes! He gets angry over the smallest of things it seems and verges on depression. but he wont talk about it and if i bring it up, he gets angry. It makes him withdrawn and he doesnt like to talk to me much or spend time with me when hes like this. He is a brilliant dad and partner but he does have control issues and really finds it hard to handle the lack of work. hes very ambitious and wants to go up the ladder and finds it so fustrating he cant. All this i understand and tolerate, however in these last 4 years hes thrown things at my head (hard from a height), slammed the freezer door shut over my foot (on purpose when i was looking it in) grabs/pushes me over (once he did it in front of the kids), swears at me alot under his breath, shouts, kicks the dog and mocks me and belittles me often, and air punches me next to my face, all if i argue with him. I have to admit i do try and stand my ground, so sometimes when i should walk away, i'll stand in the doorway in his way and argue (but i dont think that should mean he can then throw me out of the way or grab me and push me over) he always says sorry afterwards, but says its my fault because i didnt move or because i dont stop going on. But i have to stress this is only when hes feeling down and after no work for a month or two. The thing that is concerning me the most, is that my daughter has started getting really angry over tiny things now and today she threw something at me. I know it is going to have an affect on them, if this isn't addressed. And i'm not having that-I take parenting really seriously and want the very best for them, as my husband does too. i said this to him tonight, very calmly so not to provoke him, about how his anger needs addressed, as its having an affect on them and he listened but didnt say much. He just said how everything is on top of him and i just don't understand. He thinks talking is a waste of time and he doesnt want to discuss any of it. He hates everything just now. he is so negative, but i cant seem to say anything to make him see light that all isnt bad. im not sure what to do. how can i help him? and help my family. He knows his anger is an issue i think, but he wont admit it to me, or address it and seems to get worse if he things about it, as he realises the affect its having on us all. The joke is, when he gets work again in a few months, everything will be ok again and its all forgotten about and hes back to his happy self again. But i know what will happen once there are stresses at work again! its definitely getting worse and it cant go on! please help
i hate people ,because they iritate and anger me