The ever-changing world of technology and media has given the porn industry all new ways to reach people these days. The easy access to nearly anything you want to see means that anyone who wants to check out sexual images can do so anytime and anywhere. This also means that there has been an increase in internet porn addiction and the problems associated with it. But access to porn isn’t the only reason for porn becoming an addiction.
What drives an internet porn addiction?
- Sexual excitement and release? Yes.
- Available when partner isn’t? Yes.
- Explore fantasies? Yes.
These are the most common reasons for internet porn addiction. But there are other reasons that are often overlooked.
The Stress Connection To Porn Addiction
Why do men look at internet porn so habitually? Often, it is to relieve stress. Most men feel an enormous amount of stress trying to balance their work, family, and personal lives. On top of that, a lot of us guys are really bad at stress management. Men are notorious for keeping things to themselves and refusing to talk about what’s bothering them. Unfortunately, the bottling up of these emotions only compounds the stress they feel.
Internet porn provides a quick, easy, and enjoyable way to relieve tension. Why bother going to the gym or learning how to make lifestyle changes when the release of online porn is just a couple of clicks away on your computer or phone. As I said, it can be found anytime and anywhere. And, unfortunately, the prevalence of pornographic imagery in our society has made it feel like a very acceptable option. So using porn to manage stress has become an easy go-to for a majority of men.
Sexual Intimacy’s Impact On Porn Addiction
Many men can also crave a certain amount, or a type, of physical intimacy that their partner isn’t willing to give. There are many reasons this can happen. This isn’t to say by any stretch that a man develops a porn addiction because his partner won’t please him. But a lack of sexual intimacy and the gravitation toward porn viewing can have a mutual cause and effect relationship.
Men who’s partners have lost interest in sex will often turn to porn rather than physically cheating. In their minds looking at porn is a better and more acceptable option than having an affair. And although there may be some truth to that, there’s also a very big BUT that goes along with it.
If there are intimacy issues in a relationship there are better, and more satisfying ways in the long run, to handle things. Porn isn’t a solution and it certainly won’t make things better. And for many, women especially, watching porn feels like cheating.
Even looking at porn “just a little bit,” or “for just a little while” can lead to bigger problems as time goes on. Internet porn is highly addictive for a number of reasons and with it being so easy to find anyone is vulnerable. And once a man has developed a porn addiction it can be really hard to keep or regain the intimacy in the relationship at all.
What To Do About Addiction To Internet Porn
Dealing with a porn addiction can be tricky. Typically people don’t even realize they’ve become addicted. In their minds the reasons for watching porn are normal and there is noway their ‘habit’ could qualify as an addiction.
So, here are some recommendations:
If you’re a woman and you have a man with an internet porn addiction, try not to look at it just from a sexual point of view. Think about other reasons why he may be watching porn. You should also consider talking to him, or suggest he talk to an experienced counselor, about it. Bear in mind that talking about porn and the reasons for viewing it can be very embarrassing for a man. Be prepared for him to be defensive, so use the most gentle and understanding approach you can.
If you’re a man who struggles an internet porn addiction, also consider other reasons you may be looking at porn. If you’re using it for stress management, think about a better alternative, one that comes with less secrecy, guilt, and shame. If it’s a sexual intimacy issue, try taking time to talk with your partner about what’s going on and what steps you could take together to bring the intimacy back. Keep in mind that your porn habit may make the woman in your life feel insecure and as though she isn’t good enough. And she may not understand at all the reasons why you've been watching porn.
Here's the key to dealing with internet porn addiction: Understanding what's really driving our behavior. This understanding will then give you the secrets to change it. If you need additional help understanding the reasons you’re addicted to porn and ways to break the addiction, you can learn more about addictions to porn here.
Editor's Note: This post was originally published August 22, 2012 and has been updated with new information for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
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