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"My Husband Has No Interest In Sex With Me" - Here's What To Do


My Husband Has No Interest In Sex With MeQ: My husband has no interest in sex with me. I've been married to this good guy for 26 years.  Great friend and wonderful father to our two elementary school aged children.  He's always had a low libido.  For the past 5 or more years he's had E.D. on top of it.  He's seen medical doctors but even with prescriptions he has no interest in sex with me!  I'm in my late 40's and feel like I'm wasting the prime of my life in a sexless marriage.  I've been seeing an individual counselor for over a year and she had encouraged me to get him in counseling or us both in marriage counseling.  I've done the research...he won't make the appointment.  We communicate well but he makes no effort to resolve this problem.  I feel like he knows I'm trapped.    He is making me choose between our family and a sexless life.  It makes me angry.  Help.  What do you suggest?  --Renee B.

A: Feeling trapped is a common feeling for a lot of spouses -- not just wives, but men too.  And it's easy to feel angry when we feel trapped.

I can't say at this point exactly why your husband has no interest in sex or won't go to marriage counseling.  But I can tell you having worked with men with erectile dysfunction and other sexual performance problems, embarrassment and shame can be big contributors to their not wanting to talk to a counselor.

However, my guess would be that there's more going on here than just his having no interest in sex and not wanting to talk about it.  A lot of men use not going to counseling as a way to have power and control in the relationship.  And unfortunately, a lot of wives don't realize how they hand this power right over to their husbands.  I hear you surrendering power in the statement "he won't make the appointment."

I'm glad to hear that you're working with a counselor.  You're a step ahead of a lot of wives who surrender their power to do even that.

Here's what I suggest you do:

  1. Tell him you're going to marriage counseling, with or without him, but you'd like him to come with you.
  2. Give him the option to have input on choosing the counselor and meeting time.  Give him 24 hours to give you his feedback.
  3. If he gives you none, then go ahead and choose the counselor and make the appointment.
  4. Let him know what day and time the meeting is scheduled for and the location.  Tell him he can meet you there.
  5. Don't say anything else about it and go to the meeting.

I can tell you that more than a few guys want to come to tell their side of the story.  Even if he doesn't come, he'll probably be curious to know if you really went.  There are ways to discover why your husband has no interest in sex, so stop feeling trapped and learn how to change your sexless marriage.

--Kurt Smith, Marriage Counselor

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i want give love marriage and give good loving
Posted @ Thursday, March 25, 2010 11:30 PM by Muhammad Naseem
Muhammad - Glad to hear it.
Posted @ Thursday, April 08, 2010 10:55 PM by Kurt Smith, MFT, AFC
I've had no interest in sex,love,intimacy since first married 40 plus years ago, Why we married I have no idea. After having sex the first few times, I became really bored with it, Like were done, thats all, whats next. The first 15 years we had sex maybe 25 or 30 times and the next 25 years plus we hadn't had any. To this day I find no use for sex, love intimacy. I don't like being touched by any one. Shaking hands is difficult. My wife has been lonely and depressed for years. Early on I made sure she got pills for those problems. Over the years she has gotten better. I totally enjoyed how my life turned out, but I can't speak for my wife. Were just friends and always will be.
Posted @ Monday, December 27, 2010 5:13 PM by Paul
Going to counseling can definitely help with the problem - great advice!
Posted @ Friday, July 27, 2012 10:32 AM by philadelphia sexual dysfunction
I would count too much on therapy. My marriage has been sexless for 25 years and the first 7 were devoted to hours and hours of expensive therapy with many different therapists which went nowhere. You either want to have sex with somebody, and are sexually attracted to them or you are not and no amount of therapy will change that fact. The real choice when sex stops in a marriage is accept it and carry on or get a divorce.
Posted @ Saturday, August 04, 2012 3:56 PM by JamesC
This is the best advice I've seen on any website. Thank you. I think I'll start divorce proceedings.
Posted @ Sunday, August 05, 2012 3:40 PM by EVE
There is a typo in my last post it should read I WOULDN'T count too much on therapy. I should also say that despite my stay or go advice I decided to stay. And despite our sexual desire difficulties we did mange to have our children by bypassing intercourse and using Artificial Insemination and have two great kids and other than no sex the marriage is great.
Posted @ Sunday, August 05, 2012 6:08 PM by JamesC
JamesC, Sorry to hear that you didn't get the results you wanted from therapy. In addition to disagreeing on the value of professional help, I would disagree that sexual attraction is as simple as being attracted or not. So much of how the relationship functions contributes to the amount or non-existence of attraction. -Kurt
Posted @ Monday, August 13, 2012 8:28 PM by Kurt Smith, MFT, AFC
My husband has told me that he doesn't want to be with me anymore. We were separated for job reasons for a year (with many visits) and I had the kids with me. He resents me for " taking his kids from him" and now doesn't want to have a relationship anymore. Either I stay with the kids or I come back with the kids to him, but then it is "only about the kids, not about him and me" . I love him and I want to have a marriage, not a roommate with kids. What do I do? How do I win him back if he wants out of the relationships? The marriage has been rocky from the start (12 years now) and I don't know if we can make it through this if he is not interested.
Posted @ Sunday, August 19, 2012 10:10 AM by Nergui
Kurt, I don't really understand what you mean when you say "So much of how the relationship functions contributes to the amount or non-existence of attraction" 
Like I said in my post my wife and I get along great. I can't remember the last time we raised voices at each other and we are dedicated to the well being of our kids and having a happy family and that part of the marriage is really great. But there is absolutely no sexual attraction for her on my part at all. Even if I wanted to try "mercy sex" which back at the beginning one of our therapists suggest I try it totally failed because as you well know without sexual desire it is physically impossible for a man to have sex. Even with Viagra, he can eat a bucketful but without desire all that will happen is he will end up with a big headache. I do have normal sexual desire, as does my wife, but although I can get turned on by other women, with my wife it is simply impossible. But, all that being said it's a good marriage that has lasted over two decades so sexless marriages can last. People just need to accept the situation and make the best of it. I had lots of sex when I was young and single and of course I miss the skin to skin contact. But I also miss a lot of other things about my young and single days too like the freedom, the parties, getting crazy with my friends but sex like all that stuff is for young people and once you are married things change and for me at least, it has been impossible to maintain sexual desire for the same person year in and year out. I wish things were different but try as I did my body fails to co-operate when it came to attempts at sex after I was married. It made both of us very unhappy and uncomfortable and trying to have sex became very stressful and unpleasant so we stopped trying back in the late 80's. Half a dozen therapists couldn't help so like I say we just accepted the situation and carried on with out lives. 
So this is why I don't get what you wrote because other than there being no sex the marriage is fine and functions well without me having any sexual attraction for her. So I guess there are exceptions to your rule.
Posted @ Sunday, August 19, 2012 10:36 AM by JamesC
JamesC, Space restrictions are going to limit how much I can explain here. Simply put, sex is a by-product of the relationship. Sex isn's just about attraction; it's also about expressing love. I don't believe there are exceptions to that rule. 
I would suggest that perhaps your marriage isn't as good as you believe it is since the sexual part of it is absent. Often we can't see what we can't see. I'm not suggesting your marriage is bad, but it obviously has at least one problem. And in my experience that problem is fixable. -Kurt
Posted @ Wednesday, September 05, 2012 12:31 PM by Kurt Smith, MFT, AFC
my husband doesn't need therapy he needs a bomb in his rear. Been married 45 years and we only had sex once, its was our first, last and only time. He hated it, disgusting,messy, no pleasure at all, no closeness felt, and way to much work for so little. The day after we were married he moved all his stuff down stairs and has lived there all 45 years except maybe two hours on our wedding night. He never cared for me and still never talks to me or goes out of his way to be with me. He wouldn't father any kids, he calls them money sucking scum bags. 
All I feel is hate, confusion, depression. I try not to go home alot, I volenteer at a homeless shelter for women, that our church helps at. I go home on ocassion to do laundry, sleep in my own lonely bed, and make a good home cooked meal or two. My doctor helps me out alot and I thank him so much.
Posted @ Sunday, September 09, 2012 5:55 PM by Amy
To Amy, your story is probably the most painful one i have come across .No marriage is perfect , we all have issues to deal with along the way .I wonder how well you new your husband before you married him ? A marriage does need intimacy , that being sexual intimacy where possible.It bonds you to your mate and distinguishes it from all other relationships.Did your husband simply want a flat mate ,or a substitute mother ?Not good enough!He deserves to be alone .You deserve to have your time again.I give you a lot of credit for staying with him all this time ,but i dont think you should have .You only get one life , dont waste the rest of yours.xxx
Posted @ Thursday, September 27, 2012 10:22 PM by Dani
Thanks for writting, I know its been awhile since I wrote last. I'm really past the time in my life where I care any more. I've ruined my life and I hope God forgives me. Being in my mid 60s make difficult to move on. I have no place to go, no family, or real close friends. I've turned into a cold and hateful person and I keep hoping it will all go away real soon.
Posted @ Wednesday, December 12, 2012 7:17 PM by Amy
I have been married only 10 years to my husband and I care for him deeply but there are "issues". This isn't my first marriage and quit honestly I only remarried because I love sex. I don't personally believe you should have sex outside of marriage (my personal convictions). My husband and I were very close friends for many years before we married and I was so excitted when he finally asked me to marry him. I had no idea that sex would only be a quarterly thing and then only because I really force the issue. Before we got married he know I was a romatic and how important all aspects of intimacy was to me, we talked about this many times. My husband was 38 when we got married and I am the only person he has EVER been with or even dated. As I said we know each other for many years, we even went to school together. The story is he had liked me since school and was just to shy to ask me out or make advances so he just stayed close friends until one day I flat out said I really just wish he would take me away and we could get married. Next thing I know he actually asked me out .. . I am sad and hurt that there is no intimacy. I use to think it must be me but as a friend of mine pointed out that was NEVER a problem with my other marriage which has a great sex life. I try to talk openly about it to him but he just doesn't seem to really care. I really don't know what to do it is a continual battle for me not to take up other men on the offer of being with them. It is a battle I continue to win but I also am afraid someday I just may lose it and I don't want that. Please help.
Posted @ Saturday, January 05, 2013 9:58 AM by Shelly
I am 35 and my husband is 47. We have been married for 13 years. For the last 8 of those years, this marriage has been rocky. He has cheated numerous times, while pushing me away. Obviously, that's what happens. What gets me though is now he he no sexual interest in anyone (least of all me) and is fatigued all the time. He had his testosterone checked and it is at 240 when at a minimum, it should be 600. We go 3-4 months at a time without having sex, however, he'll get drunk if we go out during that same time and hit on other women, even my friends! Then when we get home, if I want to make love he'll get mad and tell me 'it' doesn't work. I am so lonely, frustrated, and confused. I feel rejected and like less of a woman because of him. I've even told him that I am seriously considering cheating on him and he gets mad. So... here's the confusion. He doesn't want to have sex with me, but he wants to sit on the couch and hold hands, give me a kiss good night every night and give me a kiss good bye and hello each day. I think I could handle this all so much better if he would just leave me the f**k alone altogether. Why bother with the little tokens of affection when the one real, true thing that makes a marriage by sealing that emotional bond is missing??? I just don't get it at all.  
If I were unattractive, unsuccessful, etc. I might understand. But I'm 35 years old, I work for a major chemical company and easily make enough money to live on my own very comfortably, so I do contribute to the household and between his income and mine, we never fight about money, so I know that's not it. I'm 5'7" - 135 lbs, I take very good care of myself and I can walk into a room and have several guys turn to check me out. He doesn't want me going out with my girlfriends because he knows I get hit on all the time, yet he doesn't really want me there. We make small talk and go to bed. That's it.  
I am incredibly lonely and unhappy and have NO idea what to do. I almost dread the end of the work day because I have to go home to an emotionally empty house. I want a divorce, but he begs me not to leave and tells me that he does love me very much and that it's him, not me. WHY PLAY GAMES?! That's what I want to scream at him!
Posted @ Friday, April 26, 2013 3:42 PM by Lori
We were together (lived) for 7 years b4 we married we then had our first child and later came #2. Our sex life I thought was great (im a nympho)! We have now been together for 17 years, married 10 of them. For the last 6 years his sex drive went form every other night to now maybe once a month if I can get him to take his Viagra. I have cheated on him with him knowing I did so. We got together when I was 18 and I feel as if I haven't been able to live my/our lives as he had a 6 year old and a baby on the way from 2 different woman. (Im not a home wrecker in any way). We spent our time together with his boy as he worked 7 days a week 12 to 14 hours a day (oilfield worker). Web we had our children it was the same. (Im a stay @ home mom). I now being 36 and him 46 feel that I deserve to be able to have me time and somehow make some friends and be able to go out once in awhile with or without him. But the no sex is a big issue with me as he has no desire to be with me and I so want to be with him in that way and every other way. My sexual desire has led me to the comfort to other mens beds and now I have fallen in love with my FWB, I know he fees the same for me as I do him but I feel trapped with all the years I have been with my husband and my kids. I so need advise please.
Posted @ Monday, May 27, 2013 2:20 PM by justlonley
dani, it must hurt your feelings you only had sex with your husband only once. on your wedding night it he felt ill about it. did you ever think you may be a cover up to his family? as humans if we dont release it comes out naturally,no pun intended,its also a loveless marriage at this point, i hope you get pention from him and all the other perks?good luck
Posted @ Monday, July 08, 2013 7:20 PM by esther
Well I am almost 60 years old and have never been in love. I wanted to but it just never happened. I had dozens of girlfriends when I was single but would get bored easily so the relationships never lasted any more than few months. I got married in order to have kids. I was 40 and I figured I better find someone to have kids with even if there was no love. I didn't realize that I would get bored of her so soon and the sex was so terrible I finally stopped it. Still we have been married for 25 years so I guess it proves you don't have to either be in love or have sexual desire for a person to stay married to them for a long time. I figure if you fall in love you're lucky because it doesn't happen to everybody.
Posted @ Monday, July 08, 2013 8:43 PM by handsolo
I have been married for 39 years and we had no sexual contact for the past three years. 
I finally had enough and told my husband I wasn't his sister I was his wife and I missed being with him. 
Part of the problem is he has had ed for years. 
I found a course on how to be with your wife and other things to do beside intercouse and it has turned our sex life around. 
We are together 3 to 4 times a week now and he takes the time to make sure I am happy. 
If you love each other enough you will make the effort. I know that he would be happy with once a week he even said that but he can read me pretty well and he takes the time to rock my world. 
We both wonder my we waited so long to be with each other because it makes you so connected to each other and makes life all around enjoyable. 
He does use some of the drugs for ed and sometimes they work and sometimes they don't but as long as we are together that's what matters. 
I was lucky that my husband was open to the course I got. 
Google Jason Julius and maybe he can help you to. 
Not that all is perfect but what we have right now is awesome and I love him more then ever and he is making the effort to make me feel wanted and loved.
Posted @ Friday, July 26, 2013 12:07 PM by Sage
Me and my boyfriend have been together for a while now and we used to have sex at least 3 times a week and we have both be through a lot. We just got our first house together and we are so happy.Well I have tried everything in my power to get him to look at me in a romantic way. I am a very romantic woman and he wont even look at me. I could be in the sexiest outfit I own and nothing, he will keep looking at his PC. I even walked in the living room naked and told him to come and take me and nothing! What do I do I need help I don't want to leave him, he is the most important person in my life and I love him with all my heart but I feel like I'm ugly and not worth his time HELP!
Posted @ Monday, July 29, 2013 9:20 PM by Tocha
This is really great post. Just in time, I've just run my new blog. and I really appreciate your time for writing this post. Great topic, thanks for taking such good care of this website!
Posted @ Friday, August 23, 2013 7:04 AM by Susan Yoga
In life, sex is a part, as well it has to be done at regular intervals. If you really feel that you are wasting your prime time in sexless marriage, have a word with your husband openly that you are interested in sex and he is the only person who can satisfy you. If he still regrets then force him to be checked,he know you are trapped but when it comes to husband there should be a mutual understanding between two. There will be a solution find it out and solve it. Thank You
Posted @ Wednesday, September 25, 2013 7:25 AM by Agoy Angel
I think some of these sexless marriage problems result from the way marriage itself is structured. Some people simply cannot maintain sexual desire for one person for years on end, especially it they need intense stimulation to become sexually satisfied. I think there are some people in this world who simply shouldn't get married. But of course even those who cannot maintain desire would still like to be part of a family and have children and although there are alternatives (ie: open marriage) these people usually pay a high price for wanting a family life in that as long as they stay in the marriage, they remain celibate.
Posted @ Wednesday, September 25, 2013 8:50 AM by Justsayin'
Let me open by writing that I am not a marriage expert, nor do I have all the answers, but I am an adult female, who seeks the truth and believes in respect and fairness for both genders and I do want to see a stop to all the blaming and scolding of females for problems in relationships that can be caused by both genders. Blaming females, must stop. Males used to be dominant in everything and many are resistant to change where females have a voice.. Women got tired of the exaltation of the male human, and started to rebel. Females want respect too, because this world is not just about males. People who do not think that females deserve respect and honor too, labeled those of us who spoke up, as feminists, but forget to label males who stand up for males, as chauvenists.  
So, anyway, I gathered a lot of information, through listening, reading, and talking with both genders about their emotions, feelngs, desires, and sexual needs. 
Some relationship experts realize the problems, but will not admit the truth and are not willing to disseminate that info. Telling the truth, would stop these internet relationship websites from blaming and scolding the female. 
I can tell you for certain, that everyone is different and that there are exceptions to every rule. But for the most part, it is true in man-woman relationships, that the man starts off all sexually charged and excited, hangs close to the female partner. He starts out being so mannerable and willing to do a lot to get that sex.:) He is not focusing on his female's emotional needs, he is focusing on the physical aspects of her. Meanwhile, she is thinking, that he is as into her as much as she is into him, mind and emotions. She wants romance and emotional connections. He wants sexual connections, morning, noon, and night.  
He just cannot understand why, in the early morning hours when he is ready, that she just wants to sleep and be left alone. She can't understand why he now wants sex, but did not take the available time yesterday to look into her eyes, hug her, cuddle her, caress her, before they got into bed. She's also tired of this lack of foreplay, that she so desperately craves. Sex to her is so boring and unsatisfying without the foreplay, unless it is few of those times, when she is just horny. Yes, females have raw, horny times. But being female, she usually needs and craves foreplay. He wonders why she needs all that. That is the way females are wired. But the marriage and relationship writers, won't tell you that. They enjoy blaming and scolding the female for being female. 
They threaten her that he will cheat. WRONG ADVICE!. Do not do that to females. Stop opening the door for infidelity and justifying this act, unless you are going to scold and blame the male and then threaten him that the female will cheat too, because of lack of her needs being met.  
Someone out there besides me, has got to stand up and tell these people the truth. Stop worshipping and exalting males and blaming and scolding females.
Posted @ Sunday, December 22, 2013 3:13 PM by Jean
My fiance and I have been together for 2.5 years, we have a brand new baby and he is a phenomenal father to my older son. He treats me amazingly and does all the little things most women bitch about their men not doing. Brings me flowers for no reason, takes the kids out so I can rest, CLEANS, provides very well for us, supports every little thing I want to do. I believe that he is a very good man. However, he doesn't like sex. A little back history: The first few months we were seeing each other (even the very first time), he had anxiety driven ED. We would be about to make love and 'goodbye'. I almost didn't make it. But we stuck it out and eventually it went away. The following few months we had sex like crazy. Everywhere, all the time. I am a hyper-sexual woman. I have the sexual drive of what we stereotype men to have. And I felt like this guy could actually keep up with me. And then it started to taper off into this once a week, same thing, same time "Are you kidding me!?" sex. Literally like clock work. And if I was able to seduce him any other times/ways he acted like it was a job. He had this "Alright, let's get this over with." attitude. Which is what's been going on ever since. (Maybe 1.5yrs).. We have fought about it many times, sat down and discussed it, I pleaded with him to tell me what was wrong with us and he always just said "Its not you, its me. I like sex and I find you sexy." The same generic lines everytime. Then a couple months ago we had a major fight and I told him that this was a big problem for me. That at this point in our lives, it was not a game changer. But I was afraid that it would be eventually. I was growing bitter and starting to resent him. So he came clean and said that he just doesn't feel comfortable with sex. That he has always felt like it was "dirty and wrong" and also that he feels very inadequate and nervous with it, so he just avoids it. And that every relationship he'd been in had ended because of it and with the woman cheating. His ex wife had an affair in their home and left him for the man, but he half condones it because he denied her all those years.. He says he has NO idea where the issues came from or how to deal with them, but he is willing to do whatever he needs to fix us. He offered to go to therapy, but I said I didnt want to make him do something he was uncomfortable with (he was terrified). I said since we kind of know the issue, let's try and work on it together first. 
Since then he's been going for sex all the time. He's going overboard, so I know he's trying too hard and pushing himself, which isn't what I wanted. I don't want sex if he doesn't want it. And most importantly, I don't want him to be uncomfortable.  
So, lastly, I just discovered he's been looking at a lot of porn. The last several months, but a lot heavier since the 'fixing it' idea. I honestly believe that he's using the porn to get himself fired up-so to speak-so he can get himself through whatever he has to do at home. I do NOT want him to develop some kind of dependency. I will leave him. I've been with a porn addict before and I would never do it again.  
I don't think that I should have to give up something so important just to be someone I love or most importantly so my kids can have a "normal" family.
Posted @ Saturday, August 02, 2014 6:48 AM by Tangerine
I don't know you but I would like to help you to see that you are being unkind, hurtful and ugly when you use the word bitchy to describe women the way we react to things. Please do not be like the Biblical wife writers on the Internet who joins in on this evil scolding and blaming of women. . Just don't do it. Men don't do this to each other. You don't read or hear them attacking each other for the sake of women. I do not know how old or young you are, but don't spread that attitude to other young females around you , because they will go on to deliver blame and females will continue to feel that they are the cause of men's selfishness, coldness, nastiness, and then their cheating.  
So do yourself a favor and eliminate that word why describing what females do in reacting to what men do or don't do. Anyway Tangerine many men do not act like men are spoked to act and many do not do the things that they are spoked to do in a relationship.
Posted @ Saturday, August 02, 2014 1:58 PM by Jean
Every woman doesn't want flowers and candy and simple gifts, that you can eat in 5 minutes. Those are the things that teenage girls want, not grown behind women.  
The average grown woman wants the same thing that so many people say that a man wants. Some women just want respect, honor, and for their man to be responsible and not leave everything to her to do.  
Some women also want a man who will keep his genitals in his pants and not cheat on her.  
Tangerine while you are so busy fussing about women, you need to tell the whole truth.
Posted @ Saturday, August 02, 2014 8:29 PM by Kitten
Ok.. Back up. I'm confused, I obviously offended people and that wasn't my intention. How am I saying anything about women at all? All I said was most women want flowers. I realize most is an extremely loaded word, but I also didn't imply at all that women don't want all the other things too. I said one line about women wanting flowers and I'm blaming and shaming them? One line is "busy being fussy"? I don't understand, but I apologize for not being more careful, i honestly thought we were all just sharing stories. I didn't know mine would make me sound sexist.
Posted @ Sunday, August 03, 2014 11:46 AM by Tangerine
When we say that women are bitchy or whiney, we do a lot of disrespect to women. But we hardly ever find anyone who would call men names like bitchy or bastards, or whiney. You thinks that's fair? 
It just strikes me as unfair and imbalanced. We are supposed to treat all people in a kind manner and I will not be a part of the trend where people label and blame women for all the ills in relationships and society.  
I don't apologize for my rant either.
Posted @ Monday, August 04, 2014 2:59 PM by Jean
Tangerine, Be careful about assuming that because you think you know what the problem is you and your fiancee can work on it yourselves. You're dealing with psychological issues that are deeper and more complicated than you think. To make sure you truly fix the problem, I'd recommend getting some professional help too. -Kurt
Posted @ Saturday, August 09, 2014 7:11 PM by Kurt Smith, LMFT, LPCC, AFC
@Jean, I completely agree w you. I preach feminism on a daily basis to any and everyone. My usage of the word "bitch" is clearly the problem here and I'm sorry it was taken incorrectly. Honestly, I did not mean it to represent women's reactions and I don't even use it in regular speech about anyone, regardless of gender. It was purely foul language utilized to blow off steam about my hurtful situation, on the internet at 4am. Clearly, we all have too much time to think and not enough time to...think. Unsubscribing. Take care, please.
Posted @ Saturday, August 09, 2014 7:13 PM by Tangerine
@ kurt. I am a huge advocate for therapy and think everyone should be in it. Everyone. As common as a physical is, therapy should be. Unfortunately it costs a fortune and takes yrs. what u are doing is wrong. You are supposed to be helping us, but u are instead capitalizing our or
Posted @ Saturday, August 09, 2014 10:14 PM by Tangerine
@ kurt... What u are doing is wrong and I hope u see that. Not professionally, but as a human. U are capitalizing peoples problems for your own gain. We are looking to you for help in pertinent situations and all u ever say is "u need therapy, pay me money.." Please take some resp
Posted @ Saturday, August 09, 2014 10:22 PM by Tangerine
@ Kurt.. What you are doing is wrong. I have looked over this website and all you ever say is "get therapy, you sick, human. I will only charge you this.." You are a human being as am I. I am a huge advocate for therapy. So much that I think it should be as common as a physical. But you are capitalizing our problems to make money. You are a salesman that we take trust in and I pitty your career. Please take consideration in how ignorant people on the internet are. If you would like to talk further, I'm sure theres a way to access my email.
Posted @ Saturday, August 09, 2014 10:33 PM by Tangerine
Thanks Tangerine for your honest reply. I enjoyed the chats. Take care of you and your family.
Posted @ Sunday, August 10, 2014 10:10 AM by Jean
Tangerine, The problems discussed on this site and their solutions are very complicated. The limited format of a comment forum like this does not allow me the ability to understand each person's circumstance sufficiently enough to accurately give them specific advice each time. Since the wrong advice can be very detrimental, possibly even life threatening, I refer people to a professional counselor for more help (doesn't have to be me). -Kurt
Posted @ Monday, August 11, 2014 9:29 AM by Kurt Smith, LMFT, LPCC, AFC
You can't change any body who doesn't want to be changed. If your female or male they are who they are. They believe in them selves as to who they are and why. Of course you can suggest some thing but it will probably be un-heard or just ignored. My husband has been this way for decades. I just gave up and do my own thing and don't worry about him. I made my own life and I'm happy about it.
Posted @ Saturday, August 30, 2014 4:00 PM by Amy
Amy, Sorry to hear that your husband doesn't respect you. You're correct that we can't change other people, but it's not always the case if you suggest something it likely will be ignored. There are relationships out there where partners value and respect the opinion of their mate. -Kurt
Posted @ Monday, September 01, 2014 8:09 AM by Kurt Smith, LMFT, LPCC, AFC
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