Counseling Men Blog
Advice for men – and the women who love them!

How To Deal With Sibling Rivalry in Adults

Posted by Michelle Walsh, GSCC Product Manager on Wed, Nov 30, 2016

Sibling rivalry in adults is as old as Cain and Able. Thousands of parenting books have been written for parents dedicated to dealing with sibling rivalry. But what happens when you’re an adult and the rivalry is still going strong?

Over holidays and longer visits, sibling rivalries can be acerbated. When visiting our families, we may end up staying in the same house, leaving us with no place to go hide from the feud with our sibling.
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What Depression Symptoms in Men Really Look Like

Posted by Kurt Smith, LMFT, LPCC, AFC on Wed, Nov 16, 2016

One of the tricky things about depression symptoms in men is that many of the symptoms don't look like depression at all. Not only do most depressed men not look depressed, but they'll tell you they don't feel like it either. In fact, these men usually look and act just like the saying goes, 'men being men.' And 'men being men' can be one of the signs (I'll explain more later on).

In contrast to the hidden depression symptoms in men, women most often look, feel, and act depressed when suffering from depression. Unlike men, women recognize and will admit it to themselves and others too. It shouldn't be surprising then that men are diagnosed with depression at much lower rates than women. Estimates suggest that in the United States women are diagnosed 2-4 times as frequently as men, and in the United Kingdom it is estimated that depression is diagnosed in 7% of women, but only 3% of men.
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Could Phubbing in Relationships Be Damaging Yours?

Posted by Michelle Walsh, GSCC Product Manager on Wed, Nov 02, 2016

Seen any phubbing in relationships lately? If not in other's relationships, how about your own?

Picture the scene: You and your boyfriend are having a nice dinner together, deep in conversation. His phone vibrates, and rather than ignore it, he whips it out to check the message, essentially interrupting you.
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Alcohol Addiction Signs That Aren’t So Obvious

Posted by Kurt Smith, LMFT, LPCC, AFC on Wed, Oct 19, 2016

Alcohol addiction signs aren't always what we'd commonly think of, like a guy passed out at a bar or someone panhandling on the street corner for beer money.

The men I treat for alcohol addiction often have signs that are much more subtle. They want to have a drink every time they go out; they seek out social events where alcohol is going to be readily available, such as golfing; they believe they aren't any fun to be around unless they're drinking.
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Is Staying Together For The Kids The Right Thing To Do?

Posted by Michelle Walsh, GSCC Product Manager on Wed, Oct 05, 2016

Should we stay together for the kids?” is probably the first thing most couples that are struggling in their relationship contemplate. No one wants to break up their family or have their kids suffer by shuffling weekly between houses. Looking at it from that point of view, it seems like an obvious answer – of course staying together for the kids is right. Right?

Maybe not. There are several important things to consider when figuring out if a relationship is worth saving. Certainly when there are kids, they have to play a part in the decision. But staying together for the kids can’t be the only (or even the main) reason to stay together.
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Is Surviving Infidelity Even Possible?

Posted by Kurt Smith, LMFT, LPCC, AFC on Thu, Sep 22, 2016

At first, surviving infidelity isn't even imaginable. How can you survive when your life is over? How will you ever get your life back? Isn't it gone forever?

The shock, actually it's really horror, that your partner could do this to you makes surviving infidelity seem impossible. Then comes the hurt, which can be overwhelming and suffocating all at the same time. Next comes the anger. For some, these feelings are separate and distinct, but for others they come all wrapped up in one gigantic ball of pain.
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Ghosting In A Relationship Is Hiding, Not Communicating

Posted by Michelle Walsh, GSCC Product Manager on Wed, Sep 07, 2016

Ghosting in a relationship is really like the ultimate silent treatment. It’s not exactly new, but over the last few years, it has become a far more prevalent way for us to handle the ending our relationships.

The combination of phones, apps and online dating has made meeting people less personal, and therefore less worthy of taking the time to communicate how we feel.
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Need Anger Problems Help? Start Here

Posted by Kurt Smith, LMFT, LPCC, AFC on Thu, Aug 25, 2016

It's pretty common that the person looking for anger problems help isn't the person with the problem. Most people who need help with anger don't realize it (been there), or deny it (done that too), or both.

If you've landed on this article searching for anger problems help you're most likely either: 1) the partner of, or someone who cares about, a person who gets angry; or 2) the person who gets angry. Your perspective is important to recognize because it will influence how you interpret the rest of this article.
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Real-Life Pornography Statistics Explained

Posted by Kurt Smith, LMFT, LPCC, AFC on Wed, Aug 10, 2016

There are a lot of out of date and inaccurate pornography statistics on the web. Surprisingly, counter to the high level of usage, not much scientific research has actually been done on porn use, and its effects on viewers and their partners. If you take a look around you'll find a lot of numbers from the early stages of the Internet, like the late 1990s and early 2000s, but not much that's more current and reliable.

It turns out that nobody wants to talk about porn, even scholarly researchers. The limited pornography statistics that are available are almost entirely based upon self-report. In other words, asking a man, "do you look at porn?" Asking someone to be honest about something they do in secret, are ashamed of, and do everything to hide is naturally going to be fraught with the potential for error.
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Your Husband Lost His Job – Here's How That Impacts Him

Posted by Michelle Walsh, GSCC Product Manager on Thu, Jul 28, 2016

Has your husband lost his job? It’s not only scary and devastating for him, but for you, too. There are so many things men go through when they lose a job, many of which women don’t really consider or maybe don’t even realize.

In 2008, my husband lost his job for the first time. The company he worked for went out of business. It was unbelievably scary. We had a preschooler and a new baby, lived in new city near no one we knew, and even if we were ready for me to go back to work, it wouldn’t have mattered because childcare costs were much more than I would have made.

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